Andre Agassi’s Open is a stunning book about tennis, self-destruction and the struggle to get out of your own way and make positive, lasting change.
Gentle reader: I know nothing of tennis. Yet the life story of a tennis player has somehow been the most engrossing and thought-provoking book I have read in quite a while.
I bought Andre Agassi’s autobiography Open* years ago, after a rave mention on some podcast I’ve long since forgotten. It sat waiting on my bookshelf for years, Agassi’s eyes gazing out from its spine. I finally took the plunge a few weeks back, and found myself hooked from page one.
My wife is a lifelong tennis fan, and a particular fan of Mr Agassi, having followed the many ups and downs of his career as they happened. I know nothing about the sport (or any sport). She showed the patience of a saint in listening to my frequent surprised exclamations at the remarkable twists and turns of his tale. Wait, what? He’s taking crystal meth now? Wait, what? He actually got married to Brooke Shields? And so on…
Whether or not you know Agassi’s story (or, indeed, have any interest in tennis), I highly recommend that you discover the wonders of Open for yourself.
Unforced errors
Agassi’s overbearing father forces him into a gruelling, endless regime of constant tennis practice from a young age. As a result of his father pushing him, Andre becomes a professional tennis player, slowly (agonisingly slowly) climbing his way to the sport’s loftiest heights.
In some ways, Agassi’s father’s work to build his son into a tennis champion was successful. Yet the resulting tennis player is far from a well-oiled tennis machine.
To describe Andre Agassi as a complex character would be to understate things a tad. Agassi constantly gets in his own way. His finger is never far from the self-destruct button. Almost every gain or step forward in his journey is followed sooner or later by a (usually avoidable) setback that (usually) comes from within himself. Anger flares up frequently. Foul language on the tennis court. Outbursts of unarticulated and barely understood feelings of rage, futility and despair. The aforementioned bout with crystal meth. Speaking of crystal meth, Open often made me think of Breaking Bad. In the first few series of Breaking Bad, mortally ill schoolteacher Walter White can’t seem to catch a break in his attempts to launch his criminal drug operation to make money for his family to inherit on his passing.
For the longest time, Agassi can’t seem to catch a break in the world of tennis. Until, at long last, he does. He finds a way to get out of his own way enough to start winning. So hard-fought is his struggle to overcome his self-sabotaging tendencies that his first prolonged winning streak (in tennis and over his own demons) brought tears to my eyes.
But even this first winning streak is relatively short. His progress through life never goes in just one direction. To use a tennis term, he can’t ever seem to stop making unforced errors.
Throughout the book, Agassi is open and honest about every aspect of his behaviour. He does not seek to minimise, explain away or excuse anything. He is aware that he is often his own worst enemy. His work to overcome his demons, to succeed in spite of them, will never end.
At one particularly low point, Agassi makes the resolution to change all aspects of his life. The single word “change” becomes a mantra repeated throughout his day. He says:
“Far from depressing me, or shaming me, the idea that I must change completely, from top to bottom, brings me back to centre. For once I don’t hear that nagging self-doubt that follows every personal resolution. I won’t fail this time, I can’t because it’s change now or change never. The idea of stagnating, of remaining this Andre for the rest of my life, that’s what I find truly depressing and shameful.”
In the next paragraph, Agassi acknowledges that having good intentions is the easy part; acting on them is much harder:
“Our best intentions are often thwarted by external forces – forces that we ourselves set in motion long ago. Decisions, especially bad ones, create their own kind of momentum, and momentum can be a bitch to stop, as every athlete knows. Even when we vow to change, even when we sorrow and atone for our mistakes, the momentum of our past keeps carrying us down the wrong road. Momentum rules the world. Momentum says: Hold on, not so fast, I’m still running things here. As a friend likes to say, quoting an old Greek poem: The minds of the everlasting gods are not changed suddenly.”
I love these words. Momentum rules the world. We each of us have a limitless potential to achieve great things. We also have an equally limitless potential for getting in our own way, for unforced errors. Progress never goes in just one direction. To make real, lasting, positive change, we have to build a new momentum. Once a new, more positive momentum is found, we must work as hard as we can to maintain it.
Andre Agassi’s Open is an incredible book about positive change achieved through endless external and internal battles. Agassi’s story is proof not only that momentum rules the world, but that we can create our own positive momentum.
May you be nothing but kind today, to yourself and to others.
May today be nothing but kind to you and yours.
FOOTNOTES
* Although Open is an autobiographical tome told entirely in Agassi’s words, Agassi himself is open about it having been put together by JR Moehringer – Pullitzer Prize-winning author of The Tender Bar, – who built the book from recordings of long, open conversations with the tennis star.
IMAGES
- Andre Agassi image via Wikimedia Commons.
- Queen of yonder selfish troop image via Wikimedia Commons.
MJCarty 
